Thoughts all over the place

Yes I know, a long time since the last post.. and as usual, I'm sorry again. For sure this is a very difficult post, cause it's the first one since I came to Spain.

[Past]    Expectations

I came here looking for a change in my life, maybe some knowledge, maybe a better future, maybe an answer for any of my questions.. I feel I didn't find any of them yet and I really don't know if I will at some point.. I just hope so..

[Present]    Imagination <> Reality

Once again life showed me that thinking abt some possibility in the future is completely different than living that moment.

I've started to work at a company I'm sure you've all heard of, but unfortunately the contract has been made through a consulting company which is not my ideal but taking in consideration that is my first job here I accepted it.

I'm considering the idea of me being bipolar (I can't stop thinking how many conflicts this word has created) cause I'm so happy at one moment and so sad the next.. I sometimes feel full and surrounded by peace and friends, but one second later I feel so lonely and that I'll be like that all this life.


Reading: Some days ago I bought "The Zahir". I've read half of it and I think it's very good cause these kind of books (very easy to read) help me to get into the habit of reading again.